The Parenting Books Have It Wrong
The books are wrong, flat out. I want to believe they are right, because I love to read. I also hold a firm believe that if you are learned enough on a subject to get a book published you know what you are talking about. The problem I’m finding is that it seems we will publish all manners of drivel these days.
The books I’m talking about are the “Here let me fix your baby because you obviously don’t know what you are doing” types of books. They prey on the insecurities of first time moms, been there done that moms, and just finished with that stage moms. They make us feel inadequate, uneducated and like if I follow steps 1 2 and 3 then I will get the desired result. And the desired result is ambiguous in itself. They gaurantee sleeping through the night, or a “happy baby” or an easier transition into the toddler world. They gaurantee things they can’t gaurantee and then when we don’t see the gaurantee’d results it must of course be because we didn’t follow step 53 right to the letter.
If I were to right a parenting book it be 5 pages.
Thank you for reading by book
Don’t physically abuse, verbally abuse or mentally abuse your child
Love him or her with every ounce of your being
Invest in a wine club a beer club or a hard alcohol club
DO NOT READ OTHER PARENTING BOOKS
Done, case closed, publish the book make me a ton of money. I just think its ridiculous that we read all these books some with data, some without. Just some person who came up with attachment parenting, non attachment parenting, just parenting, cry it out, half cry it out, why cry it out … the list goes on and on. Ultimately, you should parent how you want to and maybe listen to those around you instead of reading these ridiculous books that don’t do anything except make us feel stupid.
How about this instead of following the latest trends or the latest fads. Why don’t we listen to our mothers and our grandmothers. Mothering knowledge used to be passed down through the generations. It used to be revered and closely gaurded. It used to be protected. Women gather in circles to shae their experiences we talk to one another and trust each other’s experience. We don’t seem to trust our elders anymore though. I’m to blame as much as anyone else. If my mother or grandmother were to tell me something about how to raise my son, chances are I would dismiss their advice as outdated or dangerous even. I have been led to believe that the fact I even survived infancy 30 years ago is a miracle and the fact that my mother survived infancy 60 years ago is downright unheard of. It’s as if anyone who made it out of childhood alive even 10 years ago was lucky. Because we now have all this new information and all this new data and everything is so much safer. In 4 years there will be a whole new set of guidelines and new mothers will probably look at the fact that I put my 6 month old to sleep in his crib with breathable bumpers as downright negligent.
It’s unfair that we don’t appreciate the experience of the older generation; we take it for granted. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to let my child anywhere near the playpen I grew up in, that thing is a hazard to adults let alone children. But maybe we can pay more attention to advice, because yes “it didn’t kill me” and “I did turn out all right”
