The First Night of the Rest of Your Life …

A good friend of mine just had a baby. Mom and baby are doing great and they went home the other day.  I sat there that night, after putting my own little boy down to sleep and remembered what the first night was like for me.  It was hell.  New parents and old parents if you can remember and now romanticize the situation, it was rough.  I cried, I’m not ashamed to admit it.  I was exhausted, sitting in the dark w/ this little “bundle of joy” on my lap who wouldn’t nurse correctly and wouldn’t sleep and I just kept thinking.  “Who thought I could do this?  What planet was I on when I decided to have a baby.”  Cause the hospital actually gave me a baby and sent me home.
I went into parenthood, thinking my son will not use or do the following;

1. use a pacifier to fall asleep, 
2. no bassinet we will go straight to the crib
3. sleep in his swing
4. sleep in my arms

The list goes on and on. I slept for an hour and a half that night.  I slept for 30 minutes with my son in my arms surrounded by pillows on the couch with my feet on the coffee table.  The other hour I slept on the floor next to him while he was in his swing with the pacifier in his mouth.  I was terrified that he would fall out so I kept my hand on him the entire time.
Now I leave the swing running on the kitchen table without him buckled in while I go to the basement to put in a load of laundry.
Ahhh the things you figure out.
Sleeping was an issue for at least 10 weeks.  It took us about 5 weeks for him to figure out that 1 am was not the middle of the day and another 5 weeks for him to be old and big enough to sleep for 3.5 to 4 hour stretches.  He is now 13 weeks and sleeps for one 7 hour stretch between feedings. Of course sleeping is second to eating, he nursed so many times that night, when I looked at his mouth there was blood on it and I couldn’t figure out why.  Until I realized it wasn’t his blood it was mine.  My nipples were bleeding and it was getting into his mouth …. 10 days prior to that I would have considered that gross.  After giving birth to him a little blood barely phased me, other than the fact that my nipples were killing me.  When you have to feed them every 2 – 3 three hours and it hurts every time the temptation to quite the whole “breast is best” concept is alluring.  I did stick with it and have been breastfeeding my son for three months, which I consider a great accomplishment.  I’m aiming for 6, but we will see, I’m not putting any unnecessary pressure on myself.  I’ll breastfeed until I don’t want to anymore and refuse to feel bad about it.
It was hands down the hardest night of my life.  Good news is it does and will get better.  Bad news is it will take awhile and when u are sleep deprived and emotional a couple of weeks seems like eternity.
Hang in there mom’s you are doing great.